"Her" 2013 is so bad communicating how bad it
is strains my abilities as a reviewer. Sometimes we say, "If you've seen
the trailer, you've seen the best bits of the movie." With
"Her," if you've seen the movie's poster, you've seen the movie.
"Her" consists of shots of Joaquin Phoenix's face as he talks to
"Samantha," the operating system of his computer, and Samantha,
voiced by Scarlett Johansson, responds.
Theodore (Phoenix) is a mopey guy. His marriage failed.
He is lonely. He plays video games but appears to have no other interest or
activity. His computer's new operating system has a sexy voice. He has a
relationship with this voice. The relationship consists of him chatting with
the computer about how sad and lonely he feels and how he wishes he were in
love and in a relationship. Theodore reminisces about his marriage. In
flashbacks, he is shown cavorting and scampering with his picture-perfect, and
much younger, ex-wife as if they were the models in an ad for Viagra or
feminine protection. Theodore occasionally chats with real life people,
including neighbor Amy Adams, a fine actress who is criminally underused – at
the very least dress her in some jodhpurs! And that's it. Nothing else happens.
The movie is inert. It sits on the screen like a boring
houseguest who won't leave and who refuses to do anything excitingly offensive
enough for his host to phone the police and have him thrown out. Nothing funny
or challenging or profound or original or intriguing or witty or daring is said
or done. There's no development of the idea. The movie's end could just as well
have been the movie's middle or even its beginning. There is so much inept
nothing up on the screen I'm astounded that this movie was even released. It
genuinely frightens me that the scriptwriter and the director are convinced
that they created something worthy of viewers' time. Hubris at this level
should be actionable in a court of law.
There is one thing – and one thing only – in
"Her" that shows some creativity, intelligence and originality and
sparks some interest. "Her" is meant to be set in the not-too-distant
future. Casey Storm, "Her"'s costume designer, avoids the temptation
to create futuristic costumes such as are found in Flash Gordon, Star Trek, or
Star Wars. No one wears wings or anything metallic. Everyone dresses as if they
shop at Salvation Army and purchase the most drab, frumpy clothes available.
Collars are narrow. Pants are high-waisted. Color combinations are soporific. Theodore
wears a lot of pumpkin orange. The clothes are just bad enough to be entirely
believable as a fashion trend.
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